Have you ever been so furious with someone that you thought you were going to explode? Of course you have – we all have at one time or other. Have you ever been so angry that all you could do was sputter, unable to get out the words that were frothing on your tongue? Well, next time that happens, turn to Shakespeare for a little help.

My youngest son is studying Shakespeare at the moment, and one of his assignments is to find some Shakespearean insults. Well, let me to you…Shakespeare was the master of insults! The next time someone treats you wrong, pull out some of these lovelies, wind ‘em up and let ‘em fly.

Thou spleeny beetle-headed joithead! Thou odiferous fen-sucked miscreant! Thou pribbling ill-nurtured maggot-pie! Thou mangled pox-marked haggard! Thou crusty botch of nature! Thou puny hedge-born scut! Thou puking ill-breeding whey-face! Thou villainous weather-bitten popinjay! Thou currish milk-livered flax-wench! Thou yeasty spur-galled knave! Thou saucy fool-born malt-worm! And my personal favourite:THOU BURLEY-BONED POTTLE-DEEP SKAINSMATE!

There now, doesn’t that feel so much better?